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31 December 2007 @ 02:46 pm
Knocking On Heaven's Door  
Title : Knocking on Heaven's Door [1-]
Author : ayedel
Rating : NC-17
POV : Brendon
Summary : Ryan is the Seventh Heaven's top prostitute. Growing up in solitude, love is something he has yearned for all his life, even if it feels like it is forever out of his reach. Falling in love with someone he won’t ever get to love openly, trials and tribulations comes into his life and threatens to choke him out, all in the name of fate.
Disclaimer : Don't own. Don't care. Don't wish to be sued.
Betaed by : The ever so lovely Shelby shelbias
Dedication : Carolyn for supporting my writing and giving amazing comments. I love her more than anything <3
Author's Note : Memories

[Brendon's POV]

The door slowly creaks open and I look up, putting my book next to me at the sidetable. He walks in, with a limp in his steps as he clutches not-so-lightly on the side of his shoulder. He is desperately trying to hide it, but it is so obvious that it seizes my breath. Springing out of my seat, I quickly get to his side and hook his hands over my shoulder. After securing him and making sure that he won't fall down, I bring him slowly over to the bed.

His face looks so bad when it caught the light in the room. There are cuts and blisters across his skin, an obvious torture mark on his face and another long cut on his arm. I can't stand seeing them in all their full disgusting glory, quickly turning away with an excuse mumbled that I am getting the antiseptic and cotton to clean it up. But his hands suddenly went to my legs and pull me down, causing me to fall down unto the bed on top of him.

My eyes open wide, scooting away from his grip. His face fall, his lips turn downward from my reaction. "Brendon?" He called out in a timid voice, his eyes losing the brilliant brown in it.

I feel so bad for my reaction. He must have thought that I am disgusted with him. I am not disgusted with him. I am disgusted with myself.

"Yes?" I call back softly, not trusting in my own voice's ability to keep it cool and not sound like I am about to burst into tears.

He just nods, eyes looking at mine with a wordless request to come over as his arms outstretches towards me.

I sigh lightly, walking towards him with my reluctant body.

My body leans into his embrace and his lips come onto mine and pull them down into a kiss. I push his lips apart with my tongue a little and lick around inside before I let go of his lips.

"Ryan.." I whisper breathlessly. "Let me clean you up and bandage the wounds."

He shakes his head and refuses to let go of my shoulder that is cramped tightly by his hands. He stares into my eyes expectantly, pulling my body down onto his and pushes himself up to grinds unto my crotch harshly.

I moan, my own restraint breaking away but being the stubborn person I am, I hold on to it tightly, pushing him away before he can push me down the road that I will regret it later when its over.

"Ryan, stop." I say breathlessly. "We need to clean up your wounds before they get infected."

He looks into my eyes for a moment, confusion and uncertainty swirls in his eyes, but then he shakes his head and his hand comes to the small of my back, pushes me back down onto his body.

"But you need medical attention, Ryan!" I say persistently, a little tear coming into my own eyes, pooling there, blocking my view of him. Perhaps I wanted this as badly as him; even though my own mind is telling me that this is all nothing but a mistake. I would definitely regret it in the morning and hit myself over it then.

He shakes his head, pulling me down for another kiss and I give in to him. There is a little hope in me that I can pick up the pieces of him that has broken from being abused like this.

"Clean me of him, Brendon. Please..I want to feel clean again." He whimpers, his lips come fully unto mine, a soft peck unto my own.

I break down, push myself down unto him, my own desperation overwhelming me, tears falling down my chin as I lean into his kiss, a frantic, soft yet desperate kiss happening between our lips, my fingers nimbly removing his thin shirt that is soaked with blood at the left side, and then pulling his pants off. He removes mine too, as fast as he can, and quickly captures my lips. He softly whimpers as I palm his cock.

"Shh..Ryan, does it feel good?"

He nods, moving up into my hands as I slowly pick up the pace, watching his face changes into pleasure and it helps for a moment, it helps me to forget how much he was in pain before, help me to forget that he was being hurt and there was nothing I can do about it. Nothing. And the helplessness comes back to choke me on my breath.

"Brendon?" He calls out weakly, his voice telling me that he has heard that helplessness in my face.

"Yes Ryan?" I say, feeling my heart break every second.

"Fuck me please," He sobs out, pulling at my hair and pushing my face down until he ghostly breathes against my lips and every part of him burns my skin when I touch it, smearing a strain of pain into my flesh. The strain of bad memories, of people using him burns from his body into mine. I can barely keep myself from breaking down, pushing past and down to grab a kiss on his lips.

Before I know it, the way I wanted it to be, the way I wanted to forget and make myself close my eyes to the fact that I there's nothing I can do about it, I am inside him and he's hot, burning flash fires around me and I duck down, pushing past his lips into his mouth, nibbling his tongue lightly, hushing words of comfort into his ear, wanting the hurt to stop and the look on his face to disappear.

I thrust fluidly inside him, feeling the fire hot flesh clenching tightly around me and I lean to pull his hands tighter around my shoulder, kissing him on his lips and trying to cleanse him in the way that he believes that will purify him, pushing forward and pulling out, repeating the motion like an old rhythm implanted into our minds, when we are lost inside that world where only I can be with him, where only both of us exist and no one, nobody can hurt him anymore.

A few more thrust inside him and I can already feel the tightening knot in my stomach and I know that I cannot last very much longer. My finger slowly grabs his cock and his eyes flutter open, a look of pain and pleasure mingling in them. I kiss him on his soft lips and he whispers into my ear, "Not now..Brendon. A little longer?"

As much as it hurts me to see him like this, I can do nothing at all to save him and if that one request can make him happy, so be it. I nod, my fingers leaving his cock and push him closer, feeling his asscheeks choking my cock, tightening in the new angle and it takes all I can to not cum at that moment and break him again.

His cock rubs against my stomach and I can hear it in his voice every time I push forward into him, the friction against it. The fluid pleasure that was leaking out of his lips and he is already almost there and I pull out almost all the way out and give it my all, a quick and sharp thrust against his prostate and he comes, screaming my name from his lips and his walls clamps around me and I finally let go too, coming inside him and my body weakens, falling on top of him as ecstasy envelopes my mind and taking my thoughts away, the orgasm reigning in both of our bodies.

Realizing I am squashing him under me, I flip us around and pull him on top of me, reveling in the feeling of still being inside him. He sighs contently, even though the brokenness is still at the edge of his voice and I pull his face towards me and kiss his soft lips, tasting him for a few moments before breaking away.

"Thank you," he whispers and he leans against my shoulder and falls asleep.

Current Mood: complacentcomplacent
Current Music: crushcrushcrush - Paramore
crab_apple_kidcrab_apple_kid on December 14th, 2007 01:39 am (UTC)
Oh my gosh. This had to be the saddest chapter yet. I feel so bad for Ryan:(
Your writing always evokes such strong emotions in me.
I love this story ♥
gltyplsur on December 23rd, 2007 09:58 pm (UTC)
Wow I likethis already. More soon? :)
starcrossed lover.ayedel on December 28th, 2007 03:07 am (UTC)
Thanks. I'm glad you do. You'll have more by today. I written 15 chapters already anyway =]
saribari82 on December 24th, 2007 01:44 am (UTC)
wow. I feel so bad for Ryan D:

more soon? <3
starcrossed lover.ayedel on December 28th, 2007 03:08 am (UTC)
Awww *hugs*

Sure. I'm posting the second chapter today. You'll have more soon <3
saribari82 on December 29th, 2007 09:54 pm (UTC)
wow, cool <3 *goes to read*

sorry to reply so late, but my internet was down all day :/
kellykins11: mikey mikey mikeykellykins11 on December 24th, 2007 02:06 am (UTC)
This is absolutely beautiful.

I can't wait for more.
starcrossed lover.ayedel on December 28th, 2007 03:17 am (UTC)
Thank you =D
I'm glad you think so.
I posted the second chapter. You can find it in this comm.
Thanks for reading <3
blackeyedwicca on December 24th, 2007 08:44 am (UTC)
I really loved this, I can't wait for more!!!

Love your icon to btw ^^
(Anonymous) on December 28th, 2007 03:40 am (UTC)
Aww thanks ^^ I updated the second chapter today in this comm. Thanks for reading bb *hugs*

Lol which icon are you referring to? =D
blackeyedwicca on December 28th, 2007 08:59 am (UTC)
Cool, I'll have to look for it ^^ *hugs back*

Uhhh, I have no idea, lol.
ryan_ross_69 on December 24th, 2007 10:55 pm (UTC)
I really, really love this one <3
please continue?
Amandamandy_croyance on December 28th, 2007 08:46 am (UTC)
I really loved this, although I almost feel uncomfortable saying that because it was so very painful. I'm hoping against hope that you'll continue.
starcrossed lover.ayedel on December 28th, 2007 10:06 am (UTC)
Thanks. I'm glad that you do. I guess I started the story with this rather uncomfortable scene is to show that prostitution aren't exactly filled with people who is willing to be fucked for money like the characters in most fics that I read. Anyway, I'll continue this story. Its written till chapter 15/16 now so I'm hoping to update it regularly.

Thanks for reading <3
Courtney!Love: taste the rainbowsporky_luv on December 28th, 2007 08:45 pm (UTC)
Oh wow. This was incredibly sad yet amazing.
I'm looking forward to more soon =D
pinkstarrypantspinkstarrypants on December 28th, 2007 10:54 pm (UTC)
You just broke my heart. X
writtenaengelwrittenaengel on December 29th, 2007 01:49 am (UTC)
oh my, that was so beautifully angsty.. .it was amazing!!
more soon????
Jadebookxbutterfly on May 21st, 2009 08:05 am (UTC)
Poor Ryan. :(

At least Brendon's there to make him feel better. :)

Ryden. <3